Playing Games!!!!!

I hear women constantly say, "I don't have time for games!" My question to that is always the same, "What does that mean?"
As men we get it, we understand that the goal for 99% of women is to find a man get married and start a family. As a man I agree with that goal in life and I can appreciate a good woman. Unfortunately the world is not so black and white, what I mean is marriages don't last and the new norm is blended families. For some men that is not a problem because they may have been married before or may have kids of their own. For a guy like me, I still believe in man, women, and child. I don't want to deal with anybody elses children, ex-husbands, or baby daddys. Now with that being said, that is my ideal but sometimes life shows you something different. I have dated numerous women in the past that have kids and some of the relationships have been good and some have been terrible. I will give an example, I remember I was seeing this Internal Medicine Doctor and she had twins. I would go to her house and talk to her children and really interact with them without any second thought. 99% of the other women that I dated with kids, I did not have that experience. I would look at their kids as a burden and as something that would potentially get in the way of the relationship. Upon reflection, the reason why I did not have an issue with the doctors kids was because she was established in her career and her life had direction. She was well educated and I respected her lifestyle. I would talk to my ex girlfriends about standards and values, which I think are very important especially if you are trying to establish a long lasting relationship. If you do not share the same values and standards as your partner, there is no way the relationship can last. Case and point, I was dating a girl who actually really loved her job but she was not making enough money so she would always complain about financial issues. I would tell her that maybe she should go back to school so she can get a better job. She would say that it was not all about money and money does not define who she is in life. Of course I had no respect for her because she had a son and I think she was teaching him the wrong message. I told her that I don't necessarily like my job but I do it because it allows me to live a certain lifestyle. I thought she was being irresponsible as a parent by not working hard but instead just getting by and surviving. Especially since she was the sole provider for her son, of course the dad had nothing to do with the kid (typical). This girl really wanted to settle down with me and spend the rest of her life as my wife. Now I am not going to lie, I really liked her but I could not bring my self to settle down with somebody I did not respect. Through out the years, I seemed to be attracting women that had no education, kids, and a bullshit job. Of course they all would want to settle down with me and they would all tell me the samething, "Nobody loves you more than I do!" But as soon as I would ask them to either start school or finish school, I would always get an excuse.
I know what I can potentially bring to a relationship, especially if it is somebody that I respect. I would do anything for a woman that I love. My love has to be earned and it could take 3 months or 3 years before I know that I am in love with a person. Women seem to expect men to know from day 1 what we want, which I think is crazy. As a man, I need time to make sure that I am building something with the right person. As my dad use to say the rest of your life is long time to spend with somebody so make sure you pick the right person. I have guy friends that have went through divorce and they say it is the worse thing to ever happen financially, more so than anything else. I am not trying to give a woman half of what I earned and any woman that does not have nothing for herself to begin with will be expecting handouts.
So when I hear women saying I don't want to play games then don't play them. Men are visual and physical creatures so we are going to be trying to get in your pants from day one. Some of us have better tact than others but we are pretty much all the same. Ladies it is on you to show a man that you are more than some tits and ass. I have hung out with women in my past that I thought I only wanted one thing from but after hanging out with them for a while I started to see them as something more significant. Ladies if you carry yourself correctly and have something to show for your life, then a man will see that and want to build. Remember first impressions are lasting impressions and it is very, very hard to erase first impressions. Also ladies, make sure you know what kind of man you are dealing with because if you find a guy that has his life in order please understand you are not the only woman vying for his attention. I know guys that are bums and they have women swooning for their attention. Times are changing and the days of guys being the aggressor seems to be coming to an end. For example, a few months back I went on a date with a very attractive lady. This was my first date with the woman and over dinner I was discussing my life and how I was raised and my future goals. I remember she looked at me and said I am going to go all out and make sure you know that I am interested in you because I never meet guys that have good things going on in their lives. She followed her word and she would do everything for me, which made me feel extremely special. Understand she did not have a lot of money but she would do things for me that were within her means and I was really appreciative. You ask what happened to her? She was already in her 40's and I do eventually want to have kids and I did not think that she would want to start a family in her mid-forties and I don't only want to have one kid.
The point of this is to remember ladies, guys know when they have found somebody special just like women know when they have found somebody special. There might be games played but if you treat a man with a kind heart and support him he will eventually know who really has his back. If you feel the guy is really worth it, don't leave because he may surprise you and be the best investment you ever made!

Please check out my favorite trumpet player Roy Hargrove